


Thick Meats Monthly

by IguanaDelRey



Category: Persona 4, Persona Series
Genre: Gen, Humor, bros being bros
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-08
Updated: 2015-08-08
Packaged: 2018-04-13 16:59:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4529919
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IguanaDelRey/pseuds/IguanaDelRey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Yu and Kanji find a gay porn magazine in Yosuke's stash.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thick Meats Monthly

**Author's Note:**

> this is ridiculous
> 
> headcanon that yu is a pure, innocent baby

Yu and Kanji sat on top of Yosuke's bed, quietly facing each other while Yu nonchalantly turned a few pages.

"Hey Kanji, is deepthroating an exercise?"

"N-No it isn't.."

That bastard.. Always making fun of Kanji, always reminding him about his shadow. The tables have turned, Yosuke-senpai. The closet is wide open, and you're in it. Kanji smirked.

Somehow, Yu thought that a magazine called "Thick Meats Monthly" (thick was particularly emphasized) is about fitness and exercise. Originally, he assumed that it was about sausages, but the half-naked man on the cover seemed unfitting for that topic. There's even more shirtless men inside, and they all have really big muscles. Who knew that Yosuke was so health-conscious? That's good. Exercise and proper diets are very important factors for executing shadows and rescuing people. Yu's proud of his partner.

"Deepthroats sound tiring.. Can we try it, Kanji? I haven't done it before." Yu asked enthusiastically.

"N-No!!"

"What about handjobs?" Those must be really good for the arms! Carrying around a heavy sword always tired out Yu, and his biceps do need some work.

Kanji grimaced as he listened to the innocent teenager confuse sexual acts for workout methods. He even said "double penetration," but Yu thought that was too vague. They probably need Yosuke's help for that, but he's getting snacks for them downstairs. He'd definitely freak out if he saw his friends going through his stash. This magazine is a blessing, a blessing hidden by blond american girls and busty nurses.

And then Yu saw a penis.

Oh, an erectile dysfunction ad? But this man seems healthy. Very healthy. Very, very healthy.

"Kanji, Kanji! Look how big he is!"

"R-Rather not, Yu-senpai.." Kanji looked away and blushed. The sound of pages turning went on for a while until Yu gasped.

"Five ways to excite your man?" Dating advice too? This is a weird magazine. "All you need is love and affection! Guaranteed to excite anyone." Yu proudly explained.

"Damn straight!" Kanji agreed.

"You should model for this company, Kanji!" Kanji's a pretty buff guy! Yu's sure that they would hire him if he offered. "Y-You really think so, Senpai?!" Yu crossed his arms and smiled, confidently nodding as Kanji became flustered. That's actually really flattering.

"Thanks, man!" He chuckled awkwardly.

"Maybe Yosuke's—"

"W-What the hell are you guys doing?!" The door swung open and slammed against the wall, followed by a loud crash made by a bowl of chips landing on the floor. Almost instinctively, Yosuke screamed as he raced to the two boys sitting on top of his bed. He snatched the magazine from Yu's hand and hid it behind his back, cheeks quickly flushing pink. Yosuke was gone for, like, what? Three, five minutes? And his friends are already snooping..

Yosuke nervously switched glances at Yu and Kanji, noticing his partner's confused expression and Kanji's cocky smirk. "You took a while, Yosuke-senpai."

"Can I borrow that someday, Yosuke?"

All of a sudden, Yosuke tossed the magazine at the open window, hearing it quietly flop in his backyard as he promptly hid the rest of his exposed material under the bed. "Y-You guys didn't see anything, okay?!" Yosuke looked up and noticed that Yu was gone. He turned around to see him casually pick up the bowl from the floor, eating a few chips as he offered some to Kanji. "I really shouldn't be eating these," Yu said while munching, "that magazine gave me some motivation. Should start working out again.." Have to get fit for T.V exploration.

"Don't limit yourself, Senpai! You're already working hard enough!"

"..What the hell are you two talking about?.." Yosuke relaxed his tense shoulders, but he was still on edge. His heart's racing, he could feel the sweat coming in. Yosuke already had a bunch of excuses. He was holding that for a friend, or something. But would they really buy that?..

"Yu-senpai thinks that magazine was some kinda, health and fitness stuff."

"..Seriously?"

Yu looked confused. "Hm? Isn't it?" He glanced at Yosuke. Maybe there's hope after all. He stammered, but Yosuke was able to explain. 

"Y-Yeah! T-Trying to get that six pack and stuff, y'know?! I wanna k-keep up with Kanji, yeah!" Kanji smiled and proudly flexed while Yu applauded in amazement. "You should coach us, Kanji!"

"No problem!" He flashed a thumbs up for Yu.

"Oh right, Yosuke-senpai," Kanji rested his hand on Yosuke's trembling shoulder. "After seein' that, I don't think you can make fun of me anymore.."

He knew what he meant.

"Y-Yup.. Definitely.."

**Author's Note:**

> (taking a small break from prompts ugh)


End file.
